I dissociate, I dissociate a lot and when I get stressed I dissociate even more. It’s a real problem and it got a lot worse over the pandemic. Ok, it’s not a problem when I go to the dentist, at the dentist it’s actually massively useful because then I don’t freak out about the horrible … Read More
(Content Warning: Mental Health navel gazing) Today I got up and made two types of onigiri, some dango and not a great version of Mochi. As is traditional the Jellicle and I were late to get to the picnic under the cherry blossom and DS Luke, Arg Mike and The Live Rep were there before … Read More
One of the harder things about having Chronic Fatigue is knowing where it came from. See when I was eighteen I had Glandular Fever and then it kept coming back – despite various doctors telling me that this didn’t happen and I just had a bad cold. Or, memorably that I had glandular fever right … Read More
(Content Warning – Mental Health naval gazing again, a bit of moaning) I am used to my memory being bad, as in, it’s humorous, Mish forgot this that or the other. Mish ended up here and she should have been there. I am used to thinking that the worst of a bad memory I have … Read More
I get very frustrated with my brain of late. I’ve been too tired to get out of bed for most of last week. If I was out of bed I was at work. I haven’t done yoga in about three weeks. There’s a constant toing and froing in my thoughts asking if this is physical … Read More
(Content Warning – my mental health is still not great and this is a musing about that) The last couple of weeks has been bad when it comes to my mental and physical state. Then, driving home from the Empire event a friend messaged me. And my entire body relaxed. The whole conversation I was … Read More
(Contains spoilers for Les Miserables) Apparently this year I go and see shows in London. This time it was for work. I can tell I’m not over the latest bout of covid because everything just made me incredibly tired. When I wasn’t supporting the boss I was laying down or sleeping. I’m back on the … Read More
I’ve been concentrating on therapy to deal with trauma symptoms – trying not to dissociate and remain in the present, and appreciating that some of it does apply to dealing with ADHD. Mostly the stuff about staying in the present and getting organised. However, I’m really struggling with any of the organised elements of work … Read More
(Content Warning – talking about mental health and self diagnosis, specifically mentioning ADHD, ASD, CPTSD, Depression also referencing suicide ideation) I keep seeing pro-self-diagnosis and vehemently anti self diagnosis things up on Facebook, Twitter and TikTok, hell The Comic Satyr even referenced me in their tweet about it. Originally I was very pro-self-diagnosis because there’s … Read More
The pandemic was a strange time, I made a lot of friends all over the place. I like to make friends, it’s a distinct advantage to being me. The disadvantage or one of them is the godsdamned insomnia and nightmares when I’m trying to work through my shit. Work has provided me with a quite … Read More
