(Content Warning – I’m being hellishly frank about my mental state in this entry. I’m talking about all that good stuff, mental health, including specific diagnoses, I doubt there’s spoiler for Giovanni: Children of the Black Sun, but no promises. Oh yeah and rape/non-consent and suicide warnings because this is me) I have to admit, … Read More
The thing about emotions is they come across you in waves, and I do mean like the sea. There are the lapping waves that you can see coming and there’s a predictable regularity to them and then sometimes there’s a storm out deep at sea and it moves all the water around until the waves … Read More
I am glad that I know Glasgow pretty well, not only because it makes studying there easier but also because it doesn’t feel as bad as perhaps it would knowing that the last time I was here I went on a date with The Fae Ref. I suspect if I ever end up in A&E … Read More
There was a book by Emma Frost that I read and it stayed with me in that way that some books do. I’ve blogged about it before. Because that book very much effected my views on getting stuck in the conventions of relationships. Relationships that impress me remain those that are wide eyed and self-knowing. … Read More
I kind of hate the compliment some medical professionals use – that of having good insight into your mental health condition. I mean I get it, it’s like warning the phlebotomist that you might faint before she takes your blood. But, when you’re literally trying to think about what’s happening and the sodding organ that … Read More
My job is stressful. But the thing is, the way I do my job is stressful. I can’t seem to explain why I need to not do my job the way I do because I’m not paid enough to do it the way I do. It comes across as materialistic and it’s not exactly, it’s … Read More
This year was the year I started to really feel things. I did so much therapy last year, I really worked on things, so for all Reddit poly people can jump on my descriptions of my feelings towards The Fae Ref and Beautiful Lute and declare I’m an NRE addict, what remains is that this … Read More
I had forgotten how much of a physical feeling heartbreak is. The first time my heart was broken was just before Christmas, possibly even Christmas Eve, I had a secret boyfriend and I had to go up to the payphone the otherside of the village to call him and talk to him without my parents … Read More
I’m feeling quite chuffed with myself today, chuffed and exhausted! I signed up to Sands Challenge 13 this year. When I was asking what I should do, previously I’ve usually swum over the course of a month until getting to thirteen miles (although previous years it’s been fifteen or fourteen) The Riddling Gatekeeper suggested boardgaming. … Read More
(Content Warning: I am going to be frank about how I managed my reactions upon being confronted by an unexpected assault in a LARP, my having been raped, being queer as a teen in the nineties – don’t read if you’re not up for it) Why am I writing this? Mostly to get it out … Read More
